Saturday 1 July 2017
07.23am – How does it feel to be 62 years old today? Well, I guess it’s the reverse of being 26 because when I was 26 I had three children and had a big choice to make.
My direction was one way or the other. Did I choose the right or wrong way? Well, history will ultimately make that decision or judgment for me but for my part and regardless of my circumstances I think I made the right choice. Time never ceases and we always move forward so watch this space in the future. One thing I will say:- for as long as I live I will always fight injustice and do my best for those who are unable or unwilling to fight the Goliath that exists in this world in every quarter. So, happy birthday to me and my thanks to my wonderful mother for giving me light and breath.
07.28am – I am so glad to see my old friend Berlusconi coming back into the fold. My Party Partito Nazionale Italiano is aliened to the ideology of Forza Italia and one of the great things about being down is that:- you can only go up! So again watch this space!!!!!
Sunday 2 July 2017
08.01pm – A very hot day and the rest of the week will be hotter. Biggest problem here are the small flies – I hate them!!! Grrrr!!!
08.02pm – I noticed the news report above. How funny that the lawyer bribed two Judges. Now you would think that could not happen in the UK, eh? Well, 90% correct but 10% of the Judges will comply with the political desire or order of the government. I have never known a British Judge who accepts money for a verdict but I have a list of Judges/Magistrates who will obey the Government!!! Is that the same? Well, who knows but those 10% desecrate their oath of office all for the greater good. I think I prefer those Judges who openly take bribes – at least they can be easily found and punished!!! Better the Judge who follows his oath of office!!!
Monday 3 July 2017
07.13am – As all know my opinion on the totally unsafe conviction of Omar Benguit and the intellectually dishonest Court of Appeal in 2014 that refused his third appeal – well watch this programme if you can.
I have not seen it because we don’t have the channel but I am told that an independent jury put together by the TV Company found him not guilty. Of course, he is still in HMP Full Sutton serving life and knowing this government he will remain there but the Court of Appeal and the Ministry of Justice and the police need to hang their heads in shame failing a totally innocent man.
07.19am – Yet more news articles on my friend and ex-client Jonathan King bringing him back to Court for father charges dating back to the 1970s?
Absolutely disgraceful – how the hell can anyone prove or disprove whether anyone inappropriately touched someone??? There is no forensic or independent evidence either way so it’s just a drama and who is the best actor/actress!! That is not justice but theatre.
Monday 3 July – Wednesday 5 July 2017
Well Monday has not gone at all well. Mid morning I was told that I would be moved from the open section to a notorious unit, used mainly for youngsters who are loud and disruptive and no valid reason given. More on that later in the week. It follows the stress levels are maximum and already not feeling well the last few weeks at about eight in the evening my chest and head pains are so acute I am forced to call the officers who, can I say, responded quickly and in a professional caring and human manner. I cannot thank them enough as they called an ambulance and I went to West Suffolk Hospital in the A and E Department that was jam packed. Yet again the nurses, assistance, ambulance crew, and doctors treated me in a most professional manner and gave me an morphine drip that alleviated the pain and x-rays, blood tests and C-Scan on the head all within an OK level but I will be seeing a cardiologist very soon.
The next day a similar pain and today this morning (Wednesday) I was seen by the prison doctor and paramedic from West Suffolk Hospital. On Thursday I will find out from the Governor why my transfer to what is the segregation regime. I must thank all my colleagues from Unit 6 and other Units around HMP Highpoint for their support of me and the disgust of how I have been treated. You know now and again, other than from my family, I do actually see and feel the respect and friendship from people of all sorts here. I have not seen my family for over four and a half years and just a physical hug can go a long way to a person in prison. Now tonight (Wednesday) I have found out that my ex-client whom I defended Ian Strachan of the Royal Blackmail Trial committed suicide Christmas 2016, I am quite annoyed with my son Michael because when I last spoke to him on a visit a few weeks back he told me he was in contact with Ian who was not well. That is bloody impossible, but he may have done so to spare my feelings. I offer my condolences to his mother Elizabeth who is a good person and was great mother to him. I am so sorry that Ian Strachan chose the suicide way if it was suicide because he infiltrated the heart of the Royals and I wrote a book about it. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem and I urge all never to succumb. Again, Elizabeth if you read my diary my deepest condolences. All else, what can I say? For me it can’t get any worse that the last few days. It can only get better – I hope and pray.
Thursday 6 July 2017
10.03pm – Today has been a very long day and acutely embarrassing because for the first time in four and a half years I was accused of infringement of the rules before the Governor. One of those will be heard by a District Judge on the 19 July 2017. I have never made any infringements and on the two lower infringements the Governor gave me a caution. I truly pride myself in complying with the rules hard even those I do not like so, when I am placed on report it is sad. The allegations were very petty but you know it matters not because at the end of the day if one stops petty infringements at source one hopes it will prevent larger infringements.
10.07pm – I do not feel well the stress is truly getting to me but I guess that is what some in high places want. Well they have it so, I hope those in high places who use ground operatives to cause me upset and stress are pleased – they have succeeded.
10.09pm – What a sad few days. How I miss just a simple hug from my family. Oh well in a few hours the dawn. Do you remember the film with James Cagney ‘Each Dawn I Die?’ Well that is how the last few days have been. Yes, I am sure I will be OK.
Friday 7 July 2017
10.29pm – What a terrible way my 62nd year has started. Almost quite beyond belief but I must just deal with it. Not easy as I don’t feel well and the stress makes me more ill but I must still get on. Today I was taken back to West Suffolk hospital and saw the Cardiologist. May the Lord bless her, she was great. I have strained or pulled a cardiac muscle and will need to take pain killers. In the meantime, I see many of the people that I have helped in the past all sniggering at me and secretly loving that I am punished for, I don’t know what. I will deal with it. I just get on with being compliant and doing the best I possibly can whilst protecting my interests at all times and more important, my dignity. Many people who I rarely used to see genuinely embrace me and I can see they feel the pain. Well let time pass because it is a great healer. I don’t have a kettle; don’t have TV, no radio but lots of books so all OK, I guess. My only real issue is that I do not feel well, damn it, but here worse really until something happens by which time it’s too late. Never mind. God is with me. I can feel it all the time. He is there all around protecting me. Shall I let you into a secret? For the past four and a half years, each night, I kiss my Bible a lot and thank God for keeping me sane. That is my belief and no one can take it away from me.
Saturday 8 July 2017
08.17am – Slept reasonably OK but to add salt to the wound I have caught a cold, damn it, and the window is broken in this room so, you can but imagine how I feel. However, reading a passage in the Bible this morning (2 Chronicles 32.30) I was surprised to learn that King Hezekiah was able to dig what was then the equivalent to the Channel Tunnel. He blocked the upper part outlet of the Gihon Spring and channeled the water down to the side of the city of David, its 534 metres long. Two groups of workmen started digging at each end and met in the middle. Quite incredible for 701 BC!!!
12.40pm – Not feeling so good. This place is extremely dangerous but I am doing my best. It is not even so much the fault of the people all together in one place. I guess it is easier to manage but it is not right. Whatever, I have promised my family I will survive it.
12.43pm – Now its lunch time and thank God the door is locked. I just don’t feel well though.
06.37pm – The best part of the day is now – door locked and I am in peace by myself. Not feeling well but I just have to sit this out and after 19 July 2017 then take the appropriate legal action and I surely will. What has happened to me hardly anyone believes it and are very sympathetic, save from a few from where I was housed who love to see the downfall of man. You a person going down makes them believe they are up!!!!!!
Sunday 9 July 2017
08.35am – Did not sleep so good last night because the music was blasting out until nearly one in the morning. It’s not a problem because the boys here have nothing on this Unit and that is why it’s called ‘hell,’ having said that, many of the boys are truly polite and caring for me which I appreciate.
08.39am – Very glad to read that Kenny got his recommendation for open prison. He will go I guess, to Stanford Hill and serve another two years there, whereas, he should have been released already. The photo of him looks nothing like the real Kenny that I visited in 2012 and more so now I guess.
12.33pm – Today I went to the Chapel primarily to see Sam who is being deported tomorrow to France and I wished him all the best. At the Chapel today was a Reverend from the American Deep South and boy did she preach a fiery sermon. One thing struck me was the reference to John 3 verses 16-17. That just about sums up the Bible – you either believe or not and if you do then there is a Saviour. The lady Reverend also said that every time her life was on a downward spiral she wrote, wrote, wrote, and her best writing came out of her soul. I can relate to that! Spoke today to my son – I hope he gets the letter I wrote him soon. It may answer many questions!!!!
Monday 10 July 2017
07.42am – Did not sleep at all well but the couple of hours I did sleep I dreamed I had been able to see my mother again and I felt good. This section where I am is extremely volatile and dangerous and I really must be at my top awareness. The average age is 26 and I am 62 so I guess its just about numbers being inverted!!!!
07.04pm – Many of my friends came to see me today and I had a number of acts of true kindness both from prisoners and staff. I will just have to wait until after 19 July and all will be OK. This week James Lewis coming to see me. There is also a real situation about my transfer to Italy. I can’t say any more on that aspect for now but in the next few days we will see. You know people mock at belief in God but I am a believer and I have prayed to God that the injustice befalling me abates and it seems my cries were answered. I urge upon all the read the Gospel of John 3 verses 16 and 17. They make real sense.
07.11pm – Tomorrow one of my friends goes to open prison Hollesley Bay. May God bless him because he has been a good and true friend. That is the thing with prison or school or the military – you know a person for years and then suddenly that person is transferred sometimes with just a minutes’ notice. But the memories and friendship never falters. I am reading the ‘Miracle in the Andes’ was made into a film but the book is better.
Tuesday 11 July 2017
07.54am – I slept quite well but still by no means do I feel well. Will just have to simply grip life by the horns and get on with it.
12.58pm – This morning has been difficult. Well I’m in a difficult section. I was able to contact Caroline and at least her father was successfully operated but he will require much convalescence but I wish him so much well and affection. Gerry Bayford has stood by me throughout this and God will stand by him. Today I also entered into a covenant – more on that later, but I have promised my family that I will continue to breathe, breathe, breathe, because that is the true essence of life. I must return back to them for who knows how long but I must make it, even though many do not wish me to survive. There are many kind, good, decent and humane officers who know what has happened to me is not correct and as one said yesterday “in every bunch of grapes there is always a sour one and a rotten one but most are sweet and delicious.” How I agree and how many acts of kindness have been exhibited to me by those I would least expect.
03.08pm – Reading the Book of Revelations (written by the disciple John who was blind) and looking at chapter 20 verse 15:-
“Whoever did not have their names written in the book of the living were thrown into the lake of fire.”
Well, I have to say I sure hope I’m in that book, although at times I really feel my name has been cancelled. Still, my covenant today is a bright new beginning.
Wednesday 12 July 2017
07.35am – If ever I understood that throughout all of this I am alone yesterday made me realise it but I do have my covenant which has given me much solace. When, though, I think of many who suffer injustices ten times more than me then, I think, maybe, I am lucky. I have been away four and a half years now and of course people forget or just lose hope. I don’t blame anyone and appreciate what those few left really do for me. I heard that, for example, those who cheated Rangers Football Club were all acquitted. Well, that was a political decision of course because had there been any convictions it would have reflected on the Government. I am praying for Gerry, Caroline’s father that he gets better soon. Fight on I say to Gerry. Never give up and I will do the same but at times it’s hard. Imagine how you would feel if you never saw your family for four and a half years? How would you feel? In the 21st century, is that normal? Maybe I should seek a transfer to a prison that advances Skype calls for example? At Lowdham Grange, at least, that was a facility offered but in a State facility it just is not the case. I miss my family and Skype costs nothing. But you see it’s all about control. However, there can be excessive control that makes the system dangerous and perverse. Let’s see what happens but for me I have been treated badly and without just course.
Thursday 13 July 2017
09.15am – Slept well last night, strangely not much noise. I guess all the boys are tired. Yesterday I played table tennis with two of the boys and I felt guilty because how many times my son asked me to play with him and I was always too busy. Guilty feelings haunt me as to how I never gave time to my family but always to my blessed job, and look where my job has now landed me!!!!
09.18pm – What is also troubling me is the legal action I am taking against certain people but I know that God will help me make the right decision. Legal action must never be about vendetta but about righting a wrong!!
09.20pm – James Lewis is coming to see me. My God, ten days has passed since I was wrongly moved to this section. How time simply flies.
07.53pm – This afternoon I have served upon the Rt. Hon David Davis MP and the Hon. Antonio Tajani, the President of the European Parliament and the European Council the objection to the letter written by Theresa May MP on 31 March 2017 to invoke Art 50 (2) but unfortunately the letter is far from compliant because it talks of an ‘intention’ to leave the EU but an ‘intention’ is not definitive and as a consequence a total nullity. Let’s see how that pans out but I will take action in Court if the letter is not amended.
Friday 14 July 2017
05.43pm – The human mind and body is capable of incredible feats and punishment. I guess physical punishment consists of temporary pain and eventually it heals itself. However, mental and psychological torture – well that pretty much stays with you I guess for a long time, if not forever. The last eleven days have been difficult and a true punishment but they have not been in vain because I have learned that no matter what anyone does to me I continue to be true to myself and I will never stop helping people.
05.46pm – I had some good news today from Ipswich Magistrates Court and in due course I will share that. I also had good news from Italy and, again, I will be sharing that soon. You see I’m in a difficult Unit that needs help from the Prison Governor but nothing seems to be forthcoming. I will do my very best to ensure that this Unit receives the financial investment it needs. The officers here are truly great and work under the hardest conditions. I applaud them and I have been treated in a very human manner. Next week will be quite important for me – relative to world events its nothing but for me it will be important.
05.51pm – I have at least been able to talk to my family and Gerry is doing well and discharged from hospital. Around the world though, not so good events but I have hope for the future for all of us.
Saturday 15 July 2017
08.04am – I am really doing my best but it is not easy, nevertheless, time moves forward and next week I hope all should be better although the word ‘better’ implies an optimism one cannot really feel in these places.
08.06pm – It’s been over four and a half years since I have seen my family – wow I never thought I could go that long and with two of my children here I have only seen them a handful of times in the same amount of years but as I said children owe their parents nothing because they did not ask to enter this world. It is the duty of parents to be there for their offspring’s and I guess I have sort of failed in that because when one is in prison – justified or not – one cannot be there. Gosh if I plead guilty do I get a discount???? Good to make a joke of it but it’s no laughing matter.
12.43pm – Today I took for the first time in many years Holy Communion and I remembered when I had my first Communion at Bedford and how afraid I was to crunch the Host because I thought I would be biting the body of Christ. Today the same thing exactly but it was a good feeling. I was able to bring together the past and the present.
12.45pm – There is a great book written by Alistair Taylor called ‘A Secret History’ and I invite all of you who read my diary to try and get it. The ISBN number is 13579108642 and published by John Blake Ltd. It gives an insight into the early life of The Beatles but it does not reveal the real reason of their break up. A great book and Alistair Taylor has been shabbily treated by The Beatles.
Sunday 16 July 2017
07.46pm – The weekend in this place is always the longest and most boring because not only, not much happens, not much can happen. There is an acute shortage of staff which makes matters worse. I can’t quite understand this shortage of staff business because there are nearly 2 million people unemployed but what the heck! The weather appears to be holding so at least that.
12.17pm – You know when you think back and consider all the mistakes you have made all the wrong turnings in life? Well when you read the Bible the book of Genesis Ch.25 verses 27 -34 and Esau selling his birthright on a whim, it kind of puts the mistakes you yourself make into nothing.
12.23pm – Now I have written much about the USA in the past and when I lived in Beverly Hills I had to leave the USA every few weeks just to be able to breathe normal air. To understand the USA you need to read the book: ‘Rogue State, A Guide To The World’s Only Superpower’ by William Blum. Just a few facts: since 1945 the USA has:-
- Attempted to remove more than 50 democratically elected Governments.
- Dropped bombs on more than 30 countries.
- Attempted to suppress a populist or nationalist movement in 20 countries.
- Grossly interfered in elections in at least 30 countries.
That is without mentioning the use of torture, illegal detention and the targeting of its own people who defy or are deemed to be a threat all without due process. Yet amongst 300 million people in the USA some 25% are Roman Catholics some 72 million plus. It cannot be overlooked that the Vatican has remained silent on all of the above and continues to be so.
12.31pm – 62 years ago today I was baptized!!! My name – Innavoig Id Onafets???? Work it out!!!!
Diaries are written by GDS and deciphered to the best of Caroline’s ability, typed and published.
NB: Some images retrieved from Google, will remove at owner’s request.